Healing and Hurting: 1
by MsPryde
Summary: A plain and simple ZukoXOC fanfic. the OC: Keki; a healer sent from the Norther Water Tribe to help the Avatar. Story takes place in the last season, just after Zuko joins the Avatar's group.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter One:

Keki let out a deep breath of relief and smiled as she, rather absent--mindedly, brushed a strand of hair out of her face and pushed it back behind her ear. That was the last one, it seemed, she was done.

"Thank you so much!" Keki turned to the plump woman sitting cross-legged on the floor beside her and smiled wide, compulsively. Smiling was as natural as healing to her.

"Aw, you're welcome!" she spoke excitedly, as if every word was just fighting to come out of her mouth. She had to admit - she was pretty proud of herself.

She stood up and surveyed the scene around her. The plump woman sitting on the floor was Jenina, the kind villager who had offered Keki a place to stay while she was visiting the village and also- the mother of one of the many villagers whom had been injured in some bizarre fire nation raid. Jenina's son lay spread out on the floor, unconscious, on the floor in front of where Keki stood, and where the woman sat. He was the last in a long row of boys, girls, men, and women, even babies that had been injured in the raid. They were all well now, just resting.

Keki was a healer. It was what she did, what she was good at, and helping people made her happy. She tried to stay modest, but she was a great healer (she was known throughout most of the world! What do you expect?) and to be honest, that's why she was out here in this village in the first place. She was sent from her home in the Northern Water Tribe to seek the Avatar, to help him in his journey.

She had been sent to find him over a month ago, and had been follow his trail. He moved quickly and was secretive, since the Fire Nation would do anything to capture him. He didn't even know that Keki was looking for him, which was only really making her search harder.. It was a trail of destruction mostly. Everywhere he had went there was a city burned down, or a village torn apart…The injured people she came across, she could help, she could heal.. but there were others she came too late for…she couldn't heal the dead. It broke her heart, how often people seemed to think she could, and begged her to. 'Please bring my son back.' and other such pleas. How she wished she could… It was at those times that she felt useless. She felt like even if she could find the avatar, she wouldn't be able to help him…

She had come to realize that most people now thought the Avatar to be dead… but she felt he couldn't be. Master Takuu from back home in the Northern Tribe, had told her that helping the Avatar was her destiny. She had been given these amazing healing abilities because she was meant to travel alongside him and heal his wounds, make sure he was healthy and ready when it came time for him to take down the Fire Nation.

The village she was in had been half-destroyed by a Fire Nation man looking for the Avatar (which meant he must be nearby). Apparently the man had been angry when the villagers denied him the Avatar's location, and began to destroy the village. No one knew why he stopped before burning the whole place to the ground, but simply left instead..

So many people had been hurt.. some by falling rubble as houses fell, others had been burned by the Fire Nation man himself. A few had died…

Sometimes Keki was overwhelmed by a sadness that she just couldn't seem to shake, it followed her from town to town, village to village, no matter how many people she helped, she couldn't help herself, and how she wished she could…

Her life at the Northern Water Tribe hadn't been terrible… she had a better life than many and she knew it and wasn't ungrateful, she just… She. She hadn't been happy with it.

No, she really didn't like to complain about it. In fact, few of her friends knew her feelings about it. She would occasionally mention her unhappiness, but she didn't feel comfortable doing it. Either no one seemed to care, or people pretended to care and became upset with her for being so down all the time. She felt sick by it all, misunderstood… She could remember the way things were and it made her hurt sometimes, and she actually needed to try to get herself to smile.

She had lived with her father only. Her mother had left the Northern Tribe long ago, and the boat she had been traveling on had been attacked by the Fire Nation…

Keki had no idea if her mother was alive or if she was dead now.. Her father had given up on her almost as soon as she had gotten on the boat, he had been completely over her by the time the news of the Fire Nation's attack got to the tribe. Her father and her mother had separated shortly before she left, and he had sought out other women to make him happy. He would bring the women to their home and they would sometimes stay for days at a time. They were unknown and new and unwanted to Keki, and they spoke to her with fake kindness in their voices. They often bought her gifts as though they knew each other. It made Keki more miserable, she had begun to feel like a prisoner in her own home..(maybe that's why she had agreed to leaving on this quest so quickly, without so much as a second thought..).

She missed her mom so much sometimes, and the few friends that knew her feelings tried to understand but couldn't, or she didn't feel like they could. She cried alone a lot, those few months before she left the tribe, alone and on her bed, wishing she had something to help her feel a little better, or someone.

Keki stood and left the large hut that had been cleared out for a makeshift infirmary since the one that the village had used regularly had been half destroyed in the battle and was really too small to contain all the injured people anyways.

Now that she had healed all the injured, her job here was done. She could get back to her journey, searching for the Avatar now, even though that meant gathering her things, and asking for food from the villagers who were kind enough to spare some, and walking who knows how far in search for him. It was tiring, and at the same time, relieving. She couldn't even explain herself sometimes. She smiled to herself and put a hand over her mouth to cover it.

She sighed shortly after and walked along the village's dirt paths, coming to the well on the edge of the village to get some water, since she had used all of her water supply in healing the villagers.

A small girl, (who looked younger than thirteen) came out of the forest on the village's edge. She walked in a strange way, and her eyes were a pale green color, they looked hazy…

She was blind.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two:

**~**

She couldn't see, but she could feel, she could feel the vibrations on the Earth as she neared the well and she could feel another girl, standing near the well. She had stopped moving entirely. She wasn't even getting any water!

"What are you lookin' at?" Toph asked, blowing her hair out of her face.

She'd been around people enough to know that when they stood still like this, they were usually staring at her.

**~**

Keki recognized her almost immediately. She had been given some information before being sent to search for the Avatar all on her own like this. Even though it was her choice to go alone..

In addition to the actual Avatar's description, Keki had been told to look for two things that stood out in the Avatar's group; The Avatar's flying bison, and the Avatar's earth bending teacher - a small, blind girl by the name of Toph?

She thought it was Toph…but she couldn't quite remember.. Toph, Tiph… Her name could be Topper for all she cared, this girl fit the description!

Keki's eyes shot back and forth nervously before she summed up the courage to speak to her.

"Are…are you…To-Toph?:

The young girl's paled eyes widened and then narrowed as she got into a fighting stance; definitely an earth bender. Despite the threat she was posing, Keki was bubbly with excitement that this girl was probably traveling with the Avatar!

"Who's asking?" The small girl's voice was stern and it came out as more of a demand then a question.

Keki's eyes jumped from left to right again as she tried to think of how to explain herself she put her hands up in front of her, palms out towards her in a "please please, let's all be calm here!" gesture.

"I need to see the Avatar. I need to see him, that's all! I didn't mean to scare you…or whatever?"

The girl slowly shifted her position back, and lowered her raised fists, keeping them clenched into tight little balls, to her sides.

"Yeah, I'm Toph. I'll take you to him….. You aren't Fire Nation, are you?" she asked her voice sounded both suspicious and uncaring.

Keki smiled excitedly and giggled "Nooo" and bounced up and down on her toes with her hands in front of her stomach like a dog's paws.

Toph blinked at her blankly a few times and blew the hair out of her face again, putting her left hand on her hip and letting her fists uncurl. "Right. Follow me then." She said shortly and turned and began walking away quickly, lifting her left hand in a "follow or be left" sign.

Keki stopped her bouncing and looked away in a slightly irritated manner.

"Okay then..just walk away all fast.." she mumbled to herself before following.

They got to the edge of a cliff, past the forest and Keki looked around nervously, the thought that this may have all been a trap of some sort suddenly ocurred to her and she turned to look at Toph warily, her eyes big and sort of scared. Toph wasn't even paying her any attention. She was tapping at the ground with her feet, and she suddenly opened the ground in front of her with earth bending, making the ground shake beneath Keki's feet.

"If you still want to meet him, follow me." Toph said, grinning to herself, and jumped into the hole she had made in the ground, sliding down the tunnel it formed.

"Uhh…" Keki shifted nervously on her feet before crawling into the hole and, with one last, baleful look at the lovely blue sky flecked with white clouds above her, let go of the edge of the tunnel she was holding onto. Some of the earth came off on her hands as she went.

She slid quickly and squeezer her eyes shut tightly, trying her hardest not to scream and instead yelling out; "Ohmygod, ohmygod, ohmygod, ohmygod!OHMYG-" She slammed down onto hard cement and hit her head on the hard ground.

She sat herself up and rubbed her forehead mumbling "that hurrrt" in a whiny voice to herself, before looking up and around her.

A small group of teenagers were standing a few feet away, staring at her and whispering amongst each other as if she couldn't see or hear them.

Her eyes shot back and forth for, what felt like, the millionth time that day, and she looked them over as they whispered.

All the way on the left side was the small, blind girl; Toph. Next to her was a girl who looked only a year or two younger than her, with an annoyed and somewhat motherly expression on her face, she had long brown hair, half tied back. Next to her standing close in a protective sort of way was a boy who looked to be a little older, he looked like he could be her brother, or distant cousin… or something. Then, on his right…there he was! The Avatar. His arrow tattoos, his staff by his side, it was him, definitely. The one she had spent so much time searching for and came all this way to find, the one who didn't even know her, but she had been willing to risk her safety to come find him to help and heal him on his journey. The one who got her out of that trap she called home..

She was about to speak when she noticed _him. All the way on the right, standing a few feet away from the rest of the group, looking indifferent, he didn't seem willing to look anyone in the eye, his gaze seemed to have trailed off to a pile of rocks near a wall. His eyes slowly glanced back at her, and when he noticed she was looking at him they went back to the rock pile. His eyes were filled more with curiosity than the judgment that seemed to be glazing over the rest of the group's irises. He had a scar over on eye, and he stood straight, but awkwardly like he was unsure of himself. Keki found her cheeks warming and she looked down and put her hand over her mouth again, only for a moment, then took it back down to speak._

"_Uh..hi. I'm Keki. I'm a healer from the Northern Water Tribe…I was…I was sent to find the Avatar and help him in his journey and..it's um..I believe it's my destiny. To help you..and and…and stuff.." she trailed off nervously as they stared at her._

"_This group is getting too big!" Toph blurted out._

_The others turned their gaze to Toph with curious expressions scribbled onto their faces._

_Toph remained staring a foot or so above Keki's head, unseeing eyes blinking a few times before continuing. _

"_The more people we have with us, the harder it will be to travel and stay hidden! We already have too many people with us now that Zuko joined, and hey! The Fire Nation IS kind of after Aang, in case none of you noticed." _

_She blew her hair out of her face again, only for it to fall back in the same spots, her arms were folded across her chest and she had an annoyed expression on her face._

_There was a murmur of agreement between the boy and girl who appeared to be brother and siter._

_Keki's eyes danced back and forth in her sockets again, who was Zuko? She knew Aang was the Avatar, but who was this Zuko person?! Ugh, she shook her head to herself and looked down then back up. The Avatar was speaking._

"_Come on guys. One more person isn't going to change things! Besides, she's a healer from the Northern Tribe, she came all this way. JUST to find ME." He gave a big, proud smile to his friends._

_The girl next to Toph rolled her bright blue eyes. "Well aren't YOU modest.." she said in a bratty, sarcastic tone._

_Keki gave a nervous smile as the group began to bicker again as though she wasn't there. Keki mumbled to herself "I didn't mean to make you all fight, maybe I should go.."_

_The boy all the way on the right with the scar going across one eye was looking at her now, he looked annoyed and for some reason, Keki's heart dropped at the thought that it was she who was annoying him. Her smiled faded…_

_He spoke._

"_Don't worry about it, they're like this most of the time anyways.." he folded his arms over his chest and looked away, sort of nervously and awkwardly. _

_Keki smiled and covered her mouth with her hand without thinking and looked in the opposite direction._

_Things might be getting better for her.._


	3. Chapter 3

"That's enough arguing you guys!" The Avatar spoke with the authority of a King and Keki was wide-eyed, amazed by him for a moment. She stuttered as she looked around her.

"Is-Is this a bad time? Or something? 'Cause…I can just go." She mentally slapped herself. She couldn't "just go" she'd spent months looking for the little air bender.

He looked at her and smiled, pushing past the scarred boy and extending a hand, his grin seeming to take up his whole face. "My name is Aang, nice to meet you!"

She hesitated, shy, for a moment, then took his hand and he pulled her up with a strong yank and she stumbled over her feet. When she finally found balance, she moved her hair out of her face feeling like a complete idiot for tripping over her own feet in front of the avatar. She faced him and put her sleeve back up over her mouth and attempted to talk with it there, even though it muffled her words.

"Uhh. I'm Keki. It is a pleasure to meet you sir." She said, joking, but he took her seriously.

"You don't have to call me 'sir', even though I AM the Avatar and all." He grinned at her smugly and she raised her eyebrows at him.

Toph spoke again, "Oh great, he gave her a name. Now he's attached.""You don't have to be such a.." Keki mumbled into her sleeve. No one heard a thing.

Aang perked up and looked at his small group.

"Well, come on guys. She came all this way! Besides, we need all the help we can get."

There was a mumble of disagreement amongst the other three, and Keki began to get that knotted feeling of dread and anxiety in her stomach again, just like she used to when she would go home to her father and his "girlfriends". That feeling of "I-don't-belong-here" and "I-wish-I-could-be-someone-else". She took a ragged breath.

The boy with the scar spoke again and she found her attention immediately all on him. She couldn't look away, and it wasn't the scar she was staring at. It was just him..

"I think we should let her stay. As you all know, I can get pretty.." He paused and scratched at the back of his head in a guilty fashion, "I can get pretty reckless with my fire bending. And it would definitely help if she was around just in case. And if we have to go up against Azula and my father.." His eyes found a distant look, and he continued in a quieter, colder tone, "It would definitely help to have a good healer around."

Everyone was quiet. He appeared to be the eldest out of the group and they all took him seriously. They looked a little afraid of him too, or repelled by him maybe, "It's not like he's going to punch you in the face if you don't agree…" she thought, looking at the bizarre group through her light brown eyes.

"He makes a good point" The girl said. "Besides, it would be nice having a girl around that's a little…" She gave Toph a sideways glance, "Girlier…No offense, Toph."

Toph smirked, "Hey, I take it as a compliment."

"So it's settled then! We'll keep her!" Aang announced happily.

"Like a dog.." Keki thought, somewhat amused by it.

"Thanks.." she mumbled, as she looked around her surroundings again, when her eyes came back to the group, talking amongst themselves again, she noticed the boy with the scar staring at her. She gulped and felt her heart race so fast it seemed like she was about to have a heart attack. She mentally checked herself. "What do I look like? Do I look okay? Do I look stupid? Oh crap why is he staring at me..." She got flustered and panicked and was about to say something to him when she was caught off guard by the boy in the blue outfit addressing her. She leaned away from him at first in her shy, unsure way.

"Hi. I'm Sokka. Welcome to Team Avatar!" He yelled and did a goofy pose, then stuck out his hand to shake with her. She shook it hesitantly, and offered a small, polite smile. "Well, h-hello there." She said in a sweet voice, like talking to a kid.

He turned to the side and gestured towards the girl in the blue dress, "That's my sister, Katara. She can be a pain-" she interjected here "HEY!", "-but she looks out for all of us, she really just wants to make sure we're all okay." The girl softened at hearing that and backed down a little. "I guess you already met Toph, and Aang….so…that just leaves Zuko." The boy with the scarred face and the grumpy expression of someone who has been brooding all his life and knows no other expression, had his arms crossed over his chest and was looking at Aang and Toph, arguing over something, he gave a small glance in Keki's direction and opened his mouth as if he was about to say something. He closed it a moment later and looked away.

Sokka got closer to you suddenly and put a hand up, and whispered in your ear, "He likes to walk around here being '' but, secretly, I have a feeling he's got a soft spot deep down." Keki, looked at him oddly and just nodded her head, confused by the whole group, wondering if there wasn't something just a little wrong with them all.

The girl in the blue- Katara- walked up to her and smiled a soft smile, "Here, you must be tired, I'll show you to a room. Dinner will be ready in about an hour…Please excuse my brother. He's an idiot." she said, giving him an annoyed look. He gave a guilty smile and walked away quickly. She really was just like a mother…

Keki followed her into the temple and to a small square of a room. There was a single bed in it, with a few old blankets, and a rug on the floor, nothing else. She smiled, and at first it faltered, but Katara didn't notice. "Thank you very much." she said, and this time she did smile, a big smile. Katara smiled back, "No problem. There's fresh water just down the hall and if you need any more blankets, just ask." Keki giggled and smiled big for her, "Why thank you, sweetie." Katara looked touched, and smiled genuinely back at her before leaving the room.

Keki put her water skins down on the bed and looked around her, tired. Maybe she could take a little nap before dinner… Oh no. Ugh. Her whole body slumped as she remembered, with much annoyance, that she had left all of her things back at that woman's house above ground. She sighed, thinking she should probably go get them and tell the woman goodbye before she began to wonder what had become of the "miracle healer".

She left the room and found her way up to the above ground.

Zuko went down the stony hall of the temple. No one had seen him come down this way, no one had really noticed him even leave the group, they were too focused on making up a fire and dinner for right now. Where had she gone? The girl. The new girl. He was looking for her. He stopped. He had no idea _why he was looking for her.. what would he even say when he saw her? He stayed there in the hallway by himself for a few more moments, and practiced next to the wall._

_He ran his hand through the hair at the back of his head nervously for a moment, then began, with his other hand extended as though he was explaining something he had done wrong. "Well, uh, hi. I'm Zuko." he stopped and smacked his hand against his forehead, "No. Sokka already told her who I am.." He thought about it then, tried again. Extending his hand as though he was preparing for a handshake this time. "Uhh, hi. I thought I would come, welcome you...to…the team. We could really use a healer around here and…" He stopped and smacked his hand against his forehead again, mumbling about how stupid he was. He began pacing in the middle of the hallway, trying to decide what he was doing. "Just go in there, and talk to her like a normal person!" He hissed at himself and then stood up straight, emotionlessly, as though he hadn't just been practicing a greeting in the middle of the hallway. He entered her room, "Hi, Keki, uh-oh.." She wasn't there. He looked around the room, feeling stupider by the second. Then he punched the wall in frustration. "I don't know why I was looking for her anyways.." He left the room. _


	4. Chapter 4

Keki waved good-bye and jumped up a little as she left the woman's house, all of her possessions in a bag slung over one shoulder lazily.

"Thank you so much! Take care! Practice safe-" _wooh., almost said something turribly inappropriate there.. _she smiled at herself and chewed on the sleeve of her shirt a little as she walked back to the opening in the earth that would lead her back to where the avatar's group was staying…and she supposed, now she was staying there too. As she walked, slowly dragging her feet in the dirt, making small dust clouds rise like miniature explosions around her slip on shoes, she thought of the Avatar and his friends. She had always imagined that if and when she finally found him, she would be filled with some great…happiness! Some immense sense of purpose! But…

Her walk slowed to a stop just before the hole in the earth that served as a sort of door to the little home below.

But now she had finally found him. And the happiness that had filled her when she had first sighted Toph had gone as quickly as it had come, and it seemed that just as Keki had caught up to the Avatar, sadness had caught up to Keki yet again. Her dearest friend, her oldest foe.

She sighed and put her head down, wondering if it was even worth it to go down there with them again, have to pass them all to get to her room. Put on some sort of a happy face to avoid the question that she hated so much. That one, careless, meaningless question that people asked just like they were asking about the weather, with no actual interest in their voices, as though she couldn't tell. _What's wrong Keki?_

She remembered her friends back at the Northern Tribe had asked her that quite frequently. She remembered how little it had seemed that they had actually cared. Her problems were of no significance to them…

And what now? Now that she was away from the very things that used to bring her down? She was far away from her father and his…his… _sluts _(dare she say it) so what was this sadness still doing in her? In the back of her head she wondered why she was bothering to stand here and ask herself this when the answer had haunted her every day for what seemed like her whole life.

She felt hot tears begin to slide down her cheeks and she angrily wiped them away. Crying always frustrated her. She didn't WANT to cry. But it seemed she did so often…

She hugged herself and sniffed a little, before wiping her face and sliding down the hole to her newest "home".

She slid down onto her knees, and it burned them a little but she made no noise. She looked about, spotting the others some thirty feet away, all together around a fire, where there was a little pot set up over it. Some kind of soup they must be making for dinner. yuck..

She hurried into the little building to get to her room without them noticing her, forgetting that the earth bender was blind, but could sense movement. ..To be honest, it was more then a little creepy.

"Where do you think you're going?" Toph's voice was loud and the echo seemed to bounce around the temple, closing in on Keki like an attack.

"If she can see where I am why does she stare off into space like that…creeper…" she mumbled to herself, then perked up at them "Uhh. Just going to put some stuff in my room!" she hurried into the hall and out of the view of the others whom had all been staring at her.

She got inside and sighed, leaning against a wall. "That was craaaazyyy" she said jokingly to herself, trying to lighten the dark mood that she herself had created. She smiled, a forced, pathetic looking smirk in the dark of the hall, and then she sighed and released the grin she was trying so hard to force onto her face, like children forcing a square peg in a round hole when they played with those little wooden toy boxes back at the Water Tribe.

She shook her head at no one but herself in the otherwise empty hall and sighed again, a loud, sad sound that filled the hall, and made her feel cold and alone, despite the new friends and crackling fire just some yards beyond the entrance to the hall.

She stood for some few more moments, unaware of the boy that had started to round the corner of the hall and had stopped short, his face just barely peeking out from behind the edge of the wall, looking at her.

_What is she doing here?_ Zuko mumbled to himself. _Why isn't she with the Avatar and his friends, laughing and…talking and…having fun? _he pulled back from the corner and stayed sidled up against the wall, waiting for her to go back to the opening where dinner was no doubt being sloshed into little bowls (He felt the little appetite he had leave him as the word sloshing entered his mind). He remaind behind the wall, unsure of what to do, unsure of what he was supposed to do. He pulled at his hair in silent aggravation, _Ugh! Why do I have to feel so…so…STUPID. _He was suddenly furious with himself for even being in this stupid hallway in the first place. What did he come down here for? To see her? No! NO! HE moved away from the wall strode around the corner, passing the surprised girl as he went without so much as a sideways glance at her.

If he had given her a glance. Just a tiny, glance out of the corner of his eye. Maybe he could have just looked forward, if he had cared enough to use his peripheral vision. If he had just taken a little peek…he would have saw a girl with tears sliding down her cheeks, and a smile that seemed to be as much a part of her face as her skin.

But he didn't.

No, he didn't.

Keki had gasped in shock as he had first come around the corner. The thought that he may have been watching her in the hall all that time never even came into her mind. Her only thought, her only instinct reaction, was to smile at him as he went by. She put a sleeve incased hand up to wave to him and thought about saying a small "hi" if her throat hadn't been filled with the lump that always impregnates it when she begins to cry. It didn't matter, he didn't even care to look in her direction anyways. She sighed at this too. Ha. It's funny right? How when a day gets to be that bad, that terrible to the point where standing in a hallway, remembering sad things long passed doesn't seem too strange, something as simple as a boy not noticing a girl can break her down. And that's what it did.

She just stood there at first. She could feel how hot her face was. Her eyes felt swollen, sore, and hot. Tears stung the edges of them and threatened to roll down her cheeks as their brethren had already done. Her eyes welled with tears until her vision became blurred and she couldn't see anything through the little water droplets in her eyes. She blinked them away and the tears rolled down her cheeks. She didn't bother to wipe them away.

She made her way, wobbling, and clutching the wall for support (not that her legs were weak, but because if she didn't have something to hold her up, she might just give up in the hall there, no reason to go all the way to her room down the corridor) and moving slowly. She got to her bedroom door, and then the tears came. And not just the tears. The loud hiccupping sobs, the nearly asthmatic gasps for air in between her soft whimpers and wails. She closed the door and put her bag in front of it, heavy enough to provide a small block, but by no means cutting her off from the world. She found her way to the bed and climbed onto it, curling up in a ball on her side, and clutching the pillow as she wept into it. Her tears soaking the thin sheet.

She felt alone, she felt miserable, she felt childish. She missed her mother. She hated her father. She had no one. She needed someone.

Keki didn't know how long it was until she cried herself to sleep. But by the time she woke up, she had forgotten that the last thing she had thought about before her sobs had become her lullaby,… was him.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter Five:

"Keki?" There was a soft voice by her side, Keki clenched her eyes shut, not responding to it.

"Keki, wake up, dinner is ready." Keki sighed and opened an eye, keeping the other clenched tight. She saw the face of Katara, kneeling next to her bedside, looking up at her with her shining, big blues.

She sighed again but gave her a half-sincere smile and told Katara that she wasn't hungry.

Katara stood up and took a mother-like pose, "You need to eat something Keki, you've been laying in bed all day, for a healer, you don't seem very healthy." Her hands were on her hips, her lips were pursed.

Keki had an urge to roll her eyes….

(the urge was resisted)

"I ate earlier, before I found you guys. Really, dear, don't worry about me. I'm just tired from healing some people in the village, that's all…" Keki gave another smile, passing this one off as genuine, and then let her eyes drift to a different corner of the room.

Katara smiled back at her, "Well, if you're sure you're not hungry…" she walked to the door of the room, and paused with her hand on the faded gold of the knob, she looked at Keki curiously, "You haven't seen Zuko by any chance, have you?"

Keki's eyes widened, and she felt her brow crease as her mind dragged up the memory of who Zuko was. Her mind was still slow from sleep. She remembered, and suddenly found the layer of dust on the concrete floor of the room that was now hers to be particularly interesting. Katara just blinked at her, waiting by the door for an answer.

"No, I haven't seen him, been sleeping…" Keki finally mumbled out. Katara gave a small "oh.." and Keki was still looking at the ground when she heard the door click shut against the wooden frame.

She slumped on the bed, releasing all her muscles until she was just laying limply, hanging over the edge of the bed slightly. She gave a big sigh and then another, and another. She felt tired, but she didn't feel like sleeping anymore. She felt like she needed some kind of escape from, well, everything. But hadn't she already escaped? From her father? And her misunderstanding friends? No…, not really… because she still didn't have her mother and…and sometimes it felt like her heart had a flaming, burning hole in the middle of it, where her mother once had been. She closed her eyes and thought, trying not to cry again. Her eyes were already red and swollen, she felt like she had cried enough to last her a year, but she knew that thinking about her mom too much would bring the tears back again like a rainstorm.

She gave one more sigh before she pulled herself out of bed, and stood. She was dizzy at first, and swayed a little on her feet, her eyes fighting to find focus in the blurry room. Then it all came rushing forward and she could see straight once again. Keki combed her fingers through her hair and fixed her jacket up before leaving the safety of her room.

As she walked down the hall she could hear the others, they must have been only a few feet away from the entrance, she didn't hear all of the conversation… but it sounded like Zuko was saying he couldn't firebend anymore.. She stepped out of the hall and outside. She put a hand up, expecting the bright light of the sun to blind her momentarily, but it didn't. It was partially cloudy, and the sun would be setting soon anyways.

She took a shaky breath when she saw Zuko, and she immediately looked away, running a nervous hand through her tangled mess of hair. No one saw her step out, they were all focused on what Zuko and Aang were saying. Something about leaving to study… she stepped up to Toph and whispered

"What's going on?" Toph stared at the ground, her bangs covering most of her expressionless face, "Zuko lost his firebending ability, he always used to bend out of anger, he can't anymore. So it looks like Aang and Zuko are going to some ancient firebending temple or something like that."

Keki nodded at first then, realizing the girl was blind (duh!), said a quiet "oh, thanks.."

She took a step back and looked away from everyone, she wasn't thinking of her mother anymore, she was thinking about…

"Keki!"

She shook her head and looked around "wha-what? What's going on?"

By this point they were all staring at her with freaked out expressions planted on their faces_. Gee thanks guys…way to make me feel comfortable.. _She blinked and instinctively put a sweater sleeve up in front of her mouth, chewing on the ragged end of it.

Sokka came up to you, "You okay there, Spacey?" Keki looked annoyed at first, then just smiled it off, and nodded at him.

He looked at her in a way that she would imagine a doctor examines a patient's eyes. She backed away a little, the awkward feeling growing.

He shook his head, then walked away, "Zuko and Aang are leaving, they're going on a little firebending adventure together." Keki blinked at him and was about to say "That's good, maybe Aang will learn better at an ancient firebending ground.." but before she did she looked up and saw Zuko staring straight at her. Her eyes widened slightly and her gaze darted elsewhere. When she looked back he had his arms crossed over his chest and was looking at the ground. She sighed and mumbled a "Good for them."

Being bitter wasn't like her, but that guy just made her so…

_to be honest, he just makes it obvious of how alone I am in all of this…_

she gave a small smile, almost as a condolence to the gang and then headed to the edge of the cliff, just too see how the view was. It looked like most of them were getting ready to go to bed, Aang and Zuko were planning to leave in the morning. She got to the edge of the massive place and sat down , letting her legs dangle off the edge. It was scary but in a way, she didn't care whether she fell or not. Not anymore.

She pulled out a little sack for water and spun it around in the air with her water bending. making a star, little circles that spun around each other, a… heart. She sighed again, suspending the heart in the air for a moment.

"Keki?" a voice behind her asked roughly.

Three things happened then. The heart broke in half and fell out of the air. Keki slipped off the edge and began to fall. and Appa fell asleep some 30 feet away. (this has nothing to do with Keki, but hey, it happened.) She screamed and shut her eyes tight, hoping it wouldn't hurt when she smashed against the rocks hundreds of feet below. She made a long whining squeak as she tried her hardest not to scream. She peeked open an eye and realized she wasn't falling. A hand was holding onto the back of her hood. She glanced upwards nervously and saw Zuko, straining to pull her back up. She scrambled to grab hold of part of the ledge and pull herself up. It took a few minutes but she was back on the ledge, her chest heaving from exhaustion as she laid spread on the ledge. She looked at Zuko, smiling brightly for his help _even though it was his fault I fell in the first place freaking…_

aarrrrgh! He growled at her, looking more angry then she'd ever seen anyone in her life, she cowered backwards a little. "What the hell was that!" He growled out, it seemed like he was trying to yell behind his teeth. Ohh…the others were asleep…he was trying to be quiet. She blinked at him, her eyes big and round and glowing in the new moonlight as she tried to prevent herself from screaming back at him, how dare he yell at her for almost falling when he was the one who made her fall? That that…_ butthead… _she twisted her mouth sideways at him and gave him an annoyed look, wanting badly to tell him off.

"You could've died! You idiot! Ugh… Why does no one around here think!" he continued yelling and growling at her, staring at her like she was supposed to give him some sort of an explanation for nearly dying. She opened her mouth, genuinely….well, ticked off to put it nicely, when he looked away finally. He looked up to the moon and spoke softer, almost gentler this time.

"I didn't mean to scare you…you could have died…I know I'm scary but I didn't mean to scare you…"

Keki looked at him shocked for a moment, then she felt the corners of her mouth turning upwards in that familiar smile as she sat up next to him, she scooted close to him and he looked at her curiously out of the corner of his eye. He started an apology but she cut him off with a gentle shhh. and nudged him a little and giggled, putting her sleeve up to its familiar place over her mouth. She leaned against him lightly, feeling her cheeks grow warm, thinking to herself as many thoughts as she could process sounding like "are you really doing this, Keki?" and "Do you realize how close you are to him right now? HIM? A BOY?" but she ignored them. She knew how _turribly inappropriate _this was but….She was tired. She was lonely. She was sad… no. No. She looked at him carefully out of the corner of her wide eyes and she smiled softly again. Right now, she was happy. He softly said, almost carefully _did he plan these words?_ annunciating every word as if he was reading it off an index card, "I…came to …welcome you to the team…" Keki smiled at him and and giggled a little _it's almost like he freaking practiced, like he's reading a script or something…next thing you know he's going to be like "kiss me you fool!" she burst into a fit of giggling and he just stared at her. She looked at him with her big glowing eyes and laughed not at him but at herself and… he laughed with her._


	6. Chapter 6

**Sorry, it's short, I know, but I really liked the ending to be the end of the chapter, and there wasn't a whole lot more to write in this chapter. But Sweettart, I promise next chapter will be good. really good. 3- L**

Chapter 6

Keki yawned and stretched like a cat over the length of her bed, trying to blink away the sunlight that seemed to be streaming straight from outside through the window, directly into her eyes. She smiled, remembering last night, then stopped and looked around her wide eyed. The one thing she didn't remember of last night was the long walk from the ledge back to her room… how did she get here? She shook her head in confusion and crawled off her bed, letting her bare feet hit the dust covered cement floor, savoring the cool feeling on her bed warmed feet.

A small smile lit up her lips and she gave a loud yawn and stretched her arms out once again, trying to make herself comfortable. She fixed her jacket that was coming unzipped and let her arms swing down by her sides as she made her way outside to where she could hear the others.

Zuko and Aang were already gone, Keki found herself slightly saddened by the way Zuko had left without saying anything to…._why would he? We're not even really friends…I barely met him, he doesn't ca re…_ She sighed and said good morning to the others. The day was boring and slow. Katara was practicing water bending, Toph mostly laid around or went exploring underground with her earth bending. Keki stayed in her room most of the day and made bubbles with her water that explored the room. She leaned back onto her pillow and heard a distinctive ~crinkle~ from beneath it. She sat back up, startled by the sudden noise. The bubble popped and little water droplets stained the dust on the floor. Keki turned around and slowly, cautiously put her hand under the pillow. The coolness of it engulfed her warm fingers, and at first all she felt was the thin sheet of the pillow, then she felt it. A sheet of paper. She lifted the pillow with her other hand and pulled out the sheet of paper with her right.

She couldn't help but smile at it. She even had to stifle a giggle at first. The paper was a mess of eraser marks and scratched out words, but what it read was:

Keki, I just thought you should know, wanted to tell you I left this morning with Aang to go train. I just wanted to tell you so you wouldn't think I left without you. knew why I was gone. In case you were… wondering at all. I'll be back soon and we can see each other then, we can talk again, we can . Well, that's all I guess.. have…fun.

-Zuko

She giggled at the note and the way she could imagine Zuko saying it exactly as it was written in her mind. She held it close, wondering how she could feel so close to someone she had barely really met… and whether or not it was a good idea. She sighed as she folded the note up and put it in her bag with her other things. She tucked it away beneath her other things, as if she was hiding it, even though she knew no one would be going through her stuff. Keki made a whining noise as she spread out onto her bed and decided to take a nap, the day was going slow, she felt like she had no reason there without the avatar being there or…Zuko. She sighed again, closing her eyes, thinking of his name. Why did it feel like she was getting so attached to this guy that she barely knew? She opened her eyes and reached her arm out to the ceiling, she fell asleep there, missing her mom and missing…

When she opened her eyes again the world outside the safe walls of her room was dark. Very dark. Nearly pitch black. The world seemed to only be lit by the moonlight. A stunning white nightlight in all the dark. She smiled up at the moon and took a sketchpad and some few colored pencils out of her bag, spotting a few, small white bunnies playing in a clump of grass to the far right on the ledge. Keki laid down near the edge once again and sketched out the two rabbits, playing together with the moon behind them in the distance. As she was adding the stars in the night sky she couldn't help but feel lonely. She was missing someone, she couldn't deny it.

She sat out there for quite a while, sketching the bunnies and the moon. Then moving onto the stars and an owl she saw gliding overhead. Once or twice she stopped and just laid out there, listening to the quiet, taking in the relaxing breeze and the quiet. Taking in the beauty. She laughed out loud to herself, realizing that the people inside their rooms had no idea of the beauty going on outside.

She stopped sketching after a while and laid out there, sighing and thinking to herself. She thought about Zuko a lot. His face. His scar didn't bother her, not at all. It bothered him though, she could tell. He was ashamed by it, though she didn't know why. Even with the scar, Keki thought he looked….

She was suddenly inspired.

The image was so vivid in her mind, her only hope was that she wouldn't completely mess it up when she tried to put it on paper. She hated it when that happened. When she got a beautiful image in her mind, something that really inspired her, and then when she'd try to draw it, it came out so crappy. She made an annoyed noise at herself as she began to sketch a lake..

The sun was beginning it's slow rise when Keki finally finished her drawing. It wasn't often that she felt proud of herself or happy with herself, but she really loved her drawing…it spoke to her. She knew that if her mother saw it she would love it. She always used to love everything she drew. She sighed at the thought. Sometimes it seemed like her mom was all she thought about, but mostly it was because part of her wished she was still alive. She **knew **she was! She had to be,.. she couldn't go back to her dad, and that village. Her mom had to be alive somewhere…she had to find her…

Keki rose and trudged back to her room, sketchbook and pencils in hand. She slipped into her room as quietly as possible and put her things away. She put a hand on her bed but didn't climb on it, she thought again. She cocked her head curiously and a smile played across her lips. She giggled in the silence and left her room.

She made her way as quietly as she could down the hall.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter Seven:

"Keki?" She heard it only vaguely. Her eyes fluttered open to see the room veiled in an unholy amount of light. She groaned at the sun coming through the thinly curtained window and pushed herself up with her arms, the rest of her body remaining limp as she squinted through the brightness, trying to comprehend what was going on.

"Keki!" She heard the call again, louder this time. Keki sat up and rolled out of the bed, and started a stumbling dizzy walk to the door. She had gotten up too fast, and her head span for a moment. She could hear them talking indistinctively somewhere in the hall, it was Katara who had been calling her,

"She's not in her room, or outside near the ledge, I don't know where she is!" It seemed like she was panicking, Keki groaned as she rubbed her eyes, stumbling towards the door. She put her hand on the cold, metal doorknob and as she began to turn it she realized, _my door has a gold knob.._

Maybe it was strange to realize, but she liked the way it looked like the gold was fading on it, and leaving golden dust around her room. She took her hand off the knob and looked around the room, eyebrows raised. Her eyes widened and she slapped her sleeve over her mouth which had formed an O . Her eyes darted around the room, trying to process where she was. Her arm fell to her side as realization dawned itself upon her.

_Zuko…_

She gasped and grabbed the knob of the door once again and opened it, jumping outside as quickly as she possibly could, and slammed into someone, she gasped and pulled back, hitting the now closed door to Zuko's room. She stayed smashed against it as flat as she could possibly be, staring at the person she ran into, which was Sokka. He looked confused for a moment, then realizing who she was, smiled and shouted at her. "Keki! Everyone's looking for you!" he embraced her into a tight, quick hug and then let her go and looked at her, putting a hand to his chin as if solving a great mystery. "Hey… isn't that… ZUKO'S room!" He gave her an inquiring look paired with a knowing grin.

"Wait, well, it is but… I mean… I was just looking for something and I mean…uhh….uhh…. Don't tell the others!" she hissed suddenly at him, "Please!"

He put up his hands in a defensive way and closed his eyes, turning his head as though he was looking down the hall, "Hey, hey, this is between you and…" He opened his eye here to peek out at her, "Zuko, apparently. Your secret's safe with me."

She sighed contentedly, and gave him a small relieved smile. "Thankyou!" she stuttered out and he smiled at her, as they walked down the hall together.

"Hey guys! I found her!" He shouted as he and Keki approached the others waiting in a group outside. Katara ran up to the two and gave Keki a stern look,

"Where have you been? We searched all over for you! I saw you over on the ledge last night and I was scared to death that you fell off or something!"

Sokka interjected, "Or a wild Owl-Spider ate you." Katara gave him a death glare, and he backed away, putting his hands up again in defense, "hey, I'm just saying. It could happen!"

Katara smacked him over the head with a scroll she had in her hand and then turned her attention back to Keki, "Where were you?"

Keki's eyes shifted from side to side nervously as she bit the sleeve that was covering her mouth once more. She stuttered out something incoherent and Katara asked her again.

Luckily, Sokka interrupted once again, "I found her wandering around at the far, far end of the hall, she was just exploring, we didn't see her because she had rounded the corner and I guess she didn't hear you calling her. It's fine, Katara, calm down."

She looked at him, _Pms much?_ aggravated, "I'm perfectly CALM, Sokka. I just wanted to make sure that no one in our group DIED. Excuse me!"

Sokka sighed. Katara looked like she was about to go off on him even more when there was a sudden rush of air.

Keki felt her hair blowing in her face, her bangs blowing in all directions at once as she frantically tried to fix them. She turned to see Appa glide gracefully down to the ledge, creating gusts of air with his tail. Keki gazed up at the two people riding the massive bison with some wonder in her eyes. She smiled up at Aang as he climbed down, petting the bison's nose once he had reached the ground.

"Zuko can firebend again!" he announced loudly to the group. They seemed to be slowly migrating towards Aang and the bison while Zuko was sliding down from the saddle. Keki felt herself blush a little when his eyes met her own, and she could have sworn …was he…was he blushing too? He looked away from her too quickly to be able to tell. Keki shook her head to herself and quickly looked down to the ground, then, realizing that she was standing alone, hurried to where the others were standing with Aang and Zuko by Appa. She kept her head down, but she could feel eyes staring at her, she put her head up and peered through her bangs, thinking _hoping _it was Zuko.

It was Sokka. She stared at him for a moment. He pulled her hand down from where it was covering her mouth, and used his other hand to cup her chin in his palm and gently move her face upwards so she wasn't looking down anymore. Her eyes were big and shocked as he whispered to her while Katara hugged Aang and asked how he was,

"You're part of us now, we're just like one big family and you're part of it. So stop acting like you're alone here." Keki stared at him for a moment, wondering if he was just trying to make her feel welcome or at home or if he actually meant it. He put his hand on her shoulder and smiled at her, "I mean it, Keki." She smiled at him and suddenly felt her eyes welling with tears.

He looked at her shocked and stepped back a bit, trying to get a better look at her. "Heyy..I didn't mean to make you cry! Oh man… I really can't do anything right…" Keki's head snapped up at him and looked at him purely shocked. "What?…No! Sokka.." She smiled at him, the biggest smile she'd had in a long time, a **genuine **smile. "No, Sokka. I'm just touched, you're a sweetie." she said, still smiling big.

"A sweetie?" He looked at her curiously and she giggled "Haa, yeah." she said and hugged him tightly, smiling sweetly at him. She felt…happy. She felt like maybe this could work, maybe she could get better here, with these people. A new family. A family, that's what Sokka had called it, right? And he had said that she was part of this family, right? So…. she smiled again, this was her family now. She had brothers, she looked at Sokka as he smiled at her, putting an arm around her shoulder as he turned his attention to Aang, talking about his trip, and a sister, she looked at Toph who's blind gaze was directed towards Aang as well, and …she glanced at Katara, her expression turning sad. She didn't really have a mother. No one could fill that spot for her, it was her mother's and her mother's only.

She frowned and felt her head drift back down, but she tried to keep it up for Sokka's sake at least, for trying to help her and bring her into their little family. She brought her head back up, and found another's eyes staring back at her. _Zuko… _He was glaring. At…_at me? What did I do?…_ she glanced around her sadly, before realizing that he wasn't glaring at her, he was glaring at… Sokka.

She was confused for a moment. Completely unaware of what was going on between the two. Her brows furrowed and her sleeve-engulfed hand instinctively went back up to her mouth as she began to nervoulsy chew on it's ragged fabric. She head Sokka mutter under his breath, "What's your problem…" She whispered up at him (He's taller then her, she's relatively short for a seventeen year old) "Sokka, what's going on? Why are you all…pissy with each other?" He moved away a little to look down at her better, keeping his arm around her shoulder, "I have no clue…"

Keki sighed and hugged Sokka before observing Aang practice the new "Dragon Dance" Technique he and Zuko had learned. Keki smiled at Aang and laughed at the end of his dance. When he looked at her, she blinked at him curiously and just giggled again. Aang smiled at her and rubbed the back of his head awkwardly, "I don't know what you're laughing at, but seeing others laughs always makes me smile." He said and smiled big at her. She giggled again, looking away blushing and playing with the sleeves of her sweater.

She stayed with the group until sundown, when they all said goodnight and headed off to their rooms, slowly, one after another until it was just her there. Zuko hardly spoke to anyone, he ate his dinner then went to his room hours ago. She was the last one sitting around the fire that seemed to be slowly dying. She couldn't help but feel a bit of sadness at the way Zuko hadn't said a word to her since he came back. She *huffed* at the fire while poking it with a stick. After he went through the trouble to write her a stupid note, he didn't even say hi to her…

She sighed and slumped down on herself. _What am I doing? Falling for this guy…Aghh… he could never like someone like me, he can't even SEE me, he looks straight past me…_

She doused the fire with water and made her way to the living quarters in the complete darkness. The moon was hidden behind clouds tonight and she could barely see as she kept a hand against the rough stone of the wall to guide her to her room.

She was almost to where her door should have been when she ran into something-someone.

Keki gasped and her eyes grew wide as she searched frantically for what it was in the dark, uable to see the thing just a few inches in front of her.

Suddenly, there was a small flame in front of her. It seemed to dance in the palm of someone's hand.

"What are you doing out here?" The voice asked roughly.

She recognized it at once.

She felt her breath get caught up in her throat as she took a step back and stumbled, he saw her in the dim flicker of the light and, letting the flame go out, grabbed her and pulled her back up to him. His chest was so warm, she sighed into it, content for a moment. She breathed in, she breathed him eyes were fluttering, on the verge of closing as she took in his warmth. _Oh shi- she caught herself, realizing what she was doing she quickly pulled away, and mumbled a "sorry sorry sorry I didn't mean to-" She was about to continue when he lit the fire in his palm again and looked straight in her eyes _

"_It's okay, you… don't have to apologize… you're well.. I liked…I mean, I didn't… what are you doing out this late?" _

_She shrunk down a little, trying to make herself small, feeling embarrassed. She shied away from the light, scared he would see how her face had turned to the pigment of her red color pencil. She looked away at first then seemed to gain a little confidence and straightened herself towards him, "I can walk around if I want to… I was just going to get my sketchbook so I could go draw on the ledge or something… what are YOU doing out this late?" She countered, raising an eyebrow at him, smiling a little in the darkness at his embarrassed expression._

_He put his free hand behind his head as his eyes glanced down to the floor, avoiding Keki's eyes, he sighed to himself, even when he was looking away he seemed to see her beautiful eyes, the way they glowed by the flickering fire light in the dark…_

"_I uh…came to find you…" He mumbled, then looked back at her "But just because I thought you would do something stupid and fall off a cliff again!" _

_Keki couldn't help but smile at him. He came… to see her…_

_She didn't get her sketchbook. She didn't retrieve her colored pencils._

_Zuko lead her out to the ledge. Her new favorite spot at nights, when the air was fresh and crisp. A little cold, but a certain firebender was very warm…_

_They sat at the edge, their feet dangling over, and they began… to talk._

_Keki started._

"_Tell me about your family."_


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter Eight:

It started slow, he was hesitant and he didn't make a lot of eye contact, but Keki could tell that it was because it hurt. He was hurting the same way she was. Zuko began with telling her about his childhood, simply. The way he had always been behind his sister in the eyes of his father. The way he had always loved her more. She had been a prodigy, and he had been nothing. But to his mother… his mother had loved him, she was different. She was kind and peaceful, she had always been there for him. She had loved him…

Loved.

She had been banished when he was younger. Zuko never fully understood why. His father told him that he'd had her executed… Zuko paused here, and gave Keki a sideways glance as she was sitting to his left, before continuing. Things were never the same after that…

He stopped talking for a little while after that. Keki couldn't be sure if it was just the moonlight or not, but she thought his eyes seemed a little wet. Keki couldn't find any words… she just stared at him, filled with awe. The suffering he had been through… her own life had been nothing compared to his… but she couldn't help but feel that she understood him. His mother had been taken, just like her own. And just like Keki's mother, Zuko's mother had been there for him, cared for him. She had loved him.

Loved.

The way no one else had. No one else had seemed to even try.

She had been banished when he was younger. Zuko never fully understood why. His father told him that.. she had been executed. .

Zuko paused here and glanced sideways at Keki, sitting on his left, before continuing. He softly told her that things had never been the same after that… then stopped talking altogether.

Keki couldn't find any words… she just stared up at him, awed. The suffering he had been through… her own life seemed to be nothing in comparison to his. But she couldn't help but feel that she understood him. His mother had been taken, just like her own. And just like Keki's mother, Zuko's mother had been there for him, cared for him, loved him… when no one else had. When no one else had even seemed to try. Just like her…

Finally, he continued on again, and his story got even worse…

He told Keki about the battle his father had challenged him to, when he was only thirteen. An Agni Kai. Simply for talking out of turn. Only for trying to save some lives…

Keki was horrified. Her golden eyes rimmed with tears in the moonlight. She stared at him with her big, frightened eyes as he lightly touched his scar as he spoke. His father had fought him, Zuko was only a child. Only a child… His father had left him a reminder so that he would never forget his boundaries. It was a mark that would never go away.

He was only a child for god's sake…

Zuko stopped talking after that. And in the silence Keki looked to the moon once more, trying her hardest to be patient. She didn't want to rush him. She felt lucky as hell to just have him notice her existence on the planet, much less tell her everything he had told her in the past…however long they had been sitting out here.

She waited for five minutes, maybe a little more, and when he didn't continue she looked back to him. He was already staring at her when she turned, and he immediately looked away nervously, his eyes trying to avert the gaze of hers.

"That… That's really messed up…" her voice sounded small, and her words? Stupid.

He looked at her curiously as she chewed on her jacket sleeves nervously. The silence was killing her. She felt like an idiot. "I-I…I mean it was wrong…" She looked down feeling dumber than ever and he looked away from her. He looked mad at first. Like he was angry with her for pointing out the obvious, to be honest she was a bit irritated with herself. Then the anger in his eyes faded and he lowered his head, sadness replaced the fury in his soul's windows and he mumbled a gruff "Thank you." To her.

She smiled to herself in a slight, soft way.

At least he wasn't mad at her for being a nervous twit…

She let out a relieved sigh that she concealed as an awkward cough.

She smiled softly towards him, and blinked, letting her eyes stay closed for a moment or two longer than necessary. When she tried to open them again, her eyelids began to feel too heavy to be moved by human force. She stifled a yawn. She felt herself swaying towards Zuko and her head suddenly collided with his shoulder.

He looked down at her for a moment, too shocked to breathe, move, or speak. What was she doing?

Then, in slow realization, he gulped, grimaced, and closed his eyes all at once before awkwardly raising his arm around Keki's shoulder. She opened her eyes half way, they were already glazed over with that dreamy like haze, as she stared up at him. With the moon behind him he looked so…

Why did it feel so good to be in his arms?

Her eyes closed once again and she let the warmth of his body heat her own. Then suddenly he spoke.

His voice seemed to come from everywhere at once and she could feel the vibrations of it go through her as he spoke.

"You…you never told me about you. Your family…"

Keki moved away from him slightly, a light blush covering her cheeks as she sat herself up.

She looked towards the moon again, trying to find the words…

"My dad was from the Fire Nation.."


	9. Chapter 9

Keki moved a little more away from him, she didn't have to look at his face to know the expression. In fact she didn't want to SEE the expression. Have to look at his shocked face, the face the few people who had found out her father was from the Fire Nation had given her.

The face people gave a traitor. The face people gave a sick, mutinous dog that wanders onto their lawn during a family gathering. An unwanted mutt. That was all she was…

She felt like crying. She couldn't remember how many times she had cried in the past few days… but she didn't want to cry again. Not now. Not in front of him…

She felt a growing swell of pain around her eyes and in her temples, and she knew she was starting to tear up. She took a deep -sniff!- in, and gulped. Trying to keep the tears at bay. She finally turned to look at him, and her eyes softened at his face, his beautiful face. He wasn't looking at her like she was a disgrace. He wasn't looking at her like she was…something less than human. He was looking at her like someone cared. Keki looked down, secretly wishing she had the confidence to kiss him right there and then, like what always happens in the stories…but this was life, and she didn't have the confidence for that. He probably didn't even see her in that way…

"He…came from the Fire Nation in the very beginning of the war. He had friends in the Northern Tribe and he was tired of being a soldier in the Fire Nation. He thought that the war was.. One of the greatest ideas that anyone had come up with in a long time in this world. He supported it fully, he was just lazy. He was a lazy… He was such a lazy _bastard_." She choked a little at this and began to feel teary again, but kept it down. She swallowed hard again and when she spoke again her voice was barely above a whisper.

"I'm sorry…he was just so awful… he didn't care. He never cared…" She blinked and one tear managed to escape from her right eye. …Damn she hated that freaking tear. Go to hell, tear! She sighed. She knew that when one came….well, the others had a tendency to follow suit.

She was taking a single, long shuddery breath, ragged as she tried not to let her tears escape her, when his voice pierced the otherwise silent night again. Oh, it cut like a razor through the quiet. It was special, his voice seemed like everything that love was, if she even knew what love was. It was soft, but it was deep, it was rough but it was clear. It was so…

"Don't worry. I know what you mean. Fathers…have a tendency to become bastards, it seems. …From my experience at least. …Well, I mean.. and yours…" He suddenly looked nervous, and Keki could swear she saw a light blush grow across the Firebender's cheeks and she had to bite her lip to stop herself from smiling.

She glanced over at him, and gave him a sideways smile, that almost seemed to tell him that it was okay, he didn't need to know the perfect words to say. It was okay…

"When…" She took a deep breath, and felt like she was about to jump into a pool of icy water. "When I was 12...my mother left. She and my dad fought a lot and…I suppose, she finally had enough." Another big gulp, it was coming to the hardest part now, and she felt her breath catching in her chest. "I-I begged her…I begged her not to leave…but-but she did anyways…" she paused and tried to regain her composure. She took a few deep breaths and then spoke again. "There was a boat…headed towards the Earth Kingdom. She was always talking about how she wanted to see Ba Sing Se. She wanted to get out of the Northern Tribe and explore a little, she loved… she loved adventure. Going out and doing things. She used to take me to the furthest parts of the Tribe to explore. To the places we weren't really allowed to go. She didn't care. She was always happy, she was always having a good time…" She put her knees up to her chest and clutched them tightly to her, "The boat she left on was headed to the docks at Ba Sing Se. It was her dream…my dad was a selfish jerk, she couldn't be happy around him… when she herad about the boat to Ba Sing Se, she didn't want to miss her chance.. So she left…"

She stopped there and it was quiet for a minute. She heard Zuko take a short breath, as though he was about to speak, and then thought better of it. For three minutes, the silence consumed them. Then Keki sniffled and spoke again.

"When she left the house that day…she told me that she was going to see the boat off. She had friends on the ship and wanted to say goodbye. But…just the way she hugged me when she said goodbye that day…it wasn't the way you say goodbye to someone you'll see again in just an hour or so…and I knew. I knew she was leaving. But I knew I couldn't stop her, so I just said goodbye. Like there was nothing wrong. And after she left I cried. I went to my room and I.…I cried for hours, for days. I don't know how long…One of my mom's friends came over the next day…She told my dad that my mom had gotten on the boat. I remember listening from my doorway. The way he had reacted…like someone had told him something simple, 'There's no work Monday' or something…he just…ha. He never cared. Her name was Mira, my mom's friend. She shook her head at my dad and said she knew why mom left him…I was about to start crying again at that, but she pulled a package out of her purse. Just a little thing, covered in paper and tied on with yarn. She walked over and, she saw me, but she left it on the table nearby. She didn't bring it to me. I think she just didn't want to bother me. She was always giving me gifts when I was little."

She stopped and looked at Zuko, and now her tears _were_ running. They were going down her cheeks in long streams like rivers, almost never ending. She knew she had to wrap it up before she started sobbing and whaling. She felt sick already.

"Inside the package was a note from Mira, telling me she was sorry, my mom had gone to Ba Sing Se and she told her to telll me she loved me a lot. Then there was a glass dish. With water from the spirit lake frozen in the middle in the shape of a heart. On the back of it 'For My Love' was carved into the glass. She used to say that to me. She'd bring me lunch at healing class and it would have that written on the bag… it was just something she did… "

"Her boat was stopped by a Fire Nation ship halfway to Ba Sing Se. They raided it of supplies. At least ten people were killed. Some were taken captive. No one knows who was killed and who was captured. I never saw her again after that day. The glass stone she left me is all I have left of her.. My dad never really cared after she left. He was always out with a different girl every day. It seemed like I didn't exist. When Master Takuu came to me and told me it was my destiny to find the avatar…to help him on his journey, and heal his wounds…it was a relief. I would have bought any excuse to get out of there…but I understood that this was special in a way. I think I'm like…the greatest healer ever. But a lot of this world has heard of me. I've healed great generals, and even Kings. I'm the one that people come to when its…important, I guess. I'm…supposedly…the best there is…So here I am. No friends. No family. I finally found the Avatar and I'm not really any help right now.

It's like I just exist here. For no purpose…"

Her tears had mostly dried up, she looked up to Zuko and he was looking down to her, this time he didn't try to hide it. He continued to stare at her. Stare into her eyes. Into her soul. She felt her heart beating rapidly in her chest. Why was she telling him all this? Why did she feel so close to him.

He suddenly leaned in next to her. She could feel his breath warm on her neck. She stiffened herself, her eyes wide and shocked. She couldn't move. She couldn't _breathe! _He grabbed her around the shoulder with one strong hand and pulled her into his chest, "Come on. You're tired."

It was said softly enough to be a suggestion, just an idea. But it was him. And that made it seem like a command. She would do anything he said, she thought.

And that was a scary thing.

He lead her back by her arm, she leaned on his shoulder. Almost as soon as he had suggested going to bed, the exhaustion had fallen on her like a weight and she knew he was right. What she didn't know, was how he had known.

She peered up at him with tired, dreamy eyes. He looked down at her in a way she didn't recognize, but she liked. She loved…

When they got to the hall, he lit a small fire in the palm of his hand to light the way. They got to the door of her room and she opened it. He stood outside of the door's frame, awkwardly holding the dancing flame in his palm. "So….uh…thanks for telling me everything..it was nice. I mean! Umm..not our pasts. They aren't nice, I mean just..talking…the…"

Keki yawned and cut him off.

"I'm kinda tired…"

He blushed in the flickering light and looked away, down the hall "so…goodnight." He said, not making eye contact.

Keki blushed and began to shut the door. He put his free hand, his left, against it as it began to close to stop it and she looked up at him, confused.

Zuko leaned in quickly and kissed her, then mumbled something half hysterically about being sorry, and quickly walked down the hall, leaving her in darkness.

She closed her door.

She made her way through the dark to her bed and laid herself down.

She put her hand to her cheek and tried to remember the warmth of his lips being there.

Then, fresh tears made their way slowly down her cheeks, slanting towards her nose as she laid down, and she cried.

But she was smiling.


	10. Chapter 10

Keki rose the next morning, feeling good, sleepy, but at the same time amazingly well rested. She had the warm feelings of laying in the sun, and she quickly combed out her hair and went to see where the others were, sliding her jacket up her arms and onto her shoulders as she went.

She felt good, she felt…happy. Genuinely happy.

She stopped in the hall and rested one hand against it, her gaze drifted down to the ground and she felt a smile form on her face, a genuine smile. She felt so…amazed, and she could tell she looked it. If any of the others(Excluding Toph, of course) were to walk through the hall they would see her smiling and staring shocked and amazed at …the cement. She giggled to herself, and put her left hand, encased in its sleeve, over her mouth and left her place in the hall, making her way to the bright lights of the sun outside.

Still, she felt amazed, and she could still feel the awe-struck look on her face. Was it just a dream? Her eyebrows bent inwards curiously, and she smirked, as if the idea of her dreaming that was far from possible. Oh, no, this was very real. She had been up late last night with….with him. With Zuko. She smiled and found herself staring absolutely amazed at a pillar and tried to move away from it, but the look stayed stuck on her face like honey on the fur of a bear-cat. And…why wouldn't she be amazed? Why wouldn't she be so awe-struck? So ..enlightened? This was amazing.

She felt like she had found a way to the moon, and captured its light, its beautiful glow, in a jar, for all to behold. And he was like the moon to her…so distant, so…seemingly untouchable, but so very beautiful. The Banished Prince… She hadn't thought he'd liked her, in fact, Keki was positive he wanted nothing to do with her, but last night…after all the words they said, filled with meaning…well…that and the…the uh..the kiss… He must like her.

She found some new confidence in herself, just a bit and walked out to where the others were sitting. Zuko was teaching Aang more fire bending moves and Katara seemed to be…playing with water. Keki tried to conceal her confused face as Katara continued to bend the water in a little swirl in the air. Keki didn't understand the point…or how it was even much practice. Katara looked up and Keki smiled and looked away quickly, feeling as though she had just been caught listening in on some private conversation and walked away quickly, with greater steps than usual in an awkward fashion.

She sat down beside the pit where they usually lit fires when night fell, and watched with a small smile as Zuko practiced fire bending. His shirt was off, but she loved his face more than anything. Scarred or not, she thought it was beautiful, in a million different ways.

Katara started a fire in the pit and cooked everyone a breakfast of eggs and some sort of meat, to be honest it looked like some sort of badger-squirrel. Keki took it gratefully but wouldn't touch it, much less eat it, after all, who knows what kind of diseases badger-squirrels have? Ewww…

Katara called everyone over to get breakfast and Aang and Zuko took a break to eat as well. Sokka wolfed down his food and quickly asked for seconds, as Katara was cooking more he turned to her "Keki, are you going to eat your meat?" She shook her head quickly with wide eyes, "nooooo, you can have it." She smiled and quickly handed him her plate and put her hands back into her sweater sleeves, and hung them in front of her like little paws.

When Zuko and Anng came she smiled up at Zuko, the amazed look brought back to her eyes just by his presence. She quickly moved herself further from the group to make room for Zuko to sit next to her. His eyes met hers and he noticed her movement and then the big space beside her, obviously for him…

He looked away from her suddenly, he almost seemed…bothered by her. The wonder was quickly torn from her face. She didn't…understand. She didn't understand. What…Why…maybe she was just reading too much into that single hurtful glance… She tried to reassure herself, and looked away from the group towards the cliff and tears were close to falling from her eyes as she remembered their shadows and the way they had entangled making one big shadow figure under the moonlight the night before. She looked back to Zuko and his eyes met hers once again. She felt her hopes rise, and her eyebrows turned skyward as she waited curiously to see what he would do now.

His gaze lingered on her for a few more seconds, and those seconds felt like hours, before his eyes turned away and he sat on the other side of the group's circle, beside Aang.

Keki gagged and looked down, her eyes felt like they were about to pop out of her skull, she stared at the ground. Her throat felt like it was being compressed and she was positive she was choking on her organs, her whole boddy seemed to lift itself up as her throat muscles clenched, and she was suddenly positive that if she tried to take a breath it would come out as a dying gaspso she quickly stood and choked a "th-a-anks" out as she hurried back towards the hall and her room, her sanctuary, her bed.

Oh, why… Why did she ever open her heart to anyone at all? She was frustrated, upset, angry, she was so STUPID! She slammed the door to her room and slid down against it, and as her back slid down against the cold of the door, the tear's simultaneously slid down her hot cheeks, and as she closed her eyes, several more forced their way through the dam her eyelids formed.

She could suddenly feel the weight of every organ and every drop of blood in her body and she felt heavy and sunk further to the floor, crumpling into a depressed pile of nothing. How much she wished she could just cease to exist! Living seemed so pointless, when had she EVER been good for ANYTHING? Healing people? Yeah, great, NO water bender can HEAL. She wasn't special, she had never been anything special at all. But Zuko had taken her and made her feel that she was, he had taken her, talked to her, made her feel like she _mattered,_ and kissed her. He had kissed her… and then he stripped it all away and stood back and watched her fall, it was all a joke. She slammed her fist against the door and hissed at the pain.

That was it, wasn't it? It was some sick joke. They were probably all laughing about it right now..

"_Did you do it, Zuko? Did you kiss her?" "Yeah, I did it. You should have seen her face, she _actually_ thought I liked her and everything." _

_Then they would probably all lean back and have a good hearty chuckle while she laid here on the floor, her eyes stinging and burning changing into different, lighter shades of golden brown with each tear that made its way out. _

_She made her way to her bed, stood before it and felt both like destroying it, and curling up on it like a cat, accepting its warmth, pretending it was someone holding her instead of just another cold, inanimate object. Then again, most people seemed to be colder than that anyways.._

_She continued to cry and sob, a lump had formed in her throat that made it difficult to swallow and her entire body ached with misery. She pulled her blankets over her tightly and curled up in a ball, trying to wish, trying to wish everything away.._

_She fell asleep there, remembering Zuko's lips on her warm cheek._


End file.
